At this point I’m open to just about anything if it will work to break the cycle of addiction I’ve been in for the majority of my life. I tried going to an NA meeting the other night and as I got close to the building, I asked a couple walking ahead of me if I was in the right place. The girl turned around and asked, “NA?” Then the guy busted out laughing and gave me props for the best line he’s heard at a meeting, “Am I in the right place?” Of course I was in the right place. I wasn’t getting high somewhere else.
When I made it into the lights of the meeting room, I realized I recognized the guy from outside. It had been a good 5 or 6 years since I’d seen him last and it wasn’t pretty. I’d say he was at rock bottom or close to it. Come to find out that he was married now. I couldn’t believe how amazing he looked and how sweet his wife was to me. She made me feel welcomed like I was right at home. The kicker is that my friend received his 3 year token of clean time on the very same night I attended my first meeting.
It’s moments like that which remind me of who is really in control and it sure as hell isn’t me or you. I love it when God decides to show His love and presence in such an undeniable way that it strengthens my faith that’s pretty rock solid to start off with. I left the meeting feeling proud of myself like I might have found something that could work for me. The only requirement to be a member is the desire to stop using. Got that. I’m in. I guess I’ll just keep coming back.